what fears you the most

the imperfections of human relationships


Ever never lasting 

a man’s love is as conditional as the thing he desires. To what he can get out of it.

a woman’s love is unconditional to what she can put into it. To the potential she sees. 

Sexuality is fluid

Sexuality is not restricted. Sexuality is ever changing, it is not caged in a box. It is fluid, running like water.

Sexuality, a taboo to talk about in certain cultures due to shame and respect. But with the new millennial’s ever present to breaking conformity, sexuality is not rigid to how it used to be. With gender neutrality coming to play in major advertising campaigns, such as the likes of Jaden Smith for Vogue Korea, it can be argued that the generation of today have a more varied outlook on sexuality and relationships.

Being Asian Indian comes with it’s set of instructions, one could point out. Religion always comes into play, but what the older generation love to place on our heads is the mix up of culture with religion. Sexuality is an issue not to be discussed amongst women, yet we can discuss anything else in the horizon about men. It is aggravating. Sexual desires are always tossed away. Sexual fantasies, oh darling your ass would be deported back home. But the thought of you meddling with another girl, damn shit would hit the fan.

I guess time has changed and pushed society into hyper speed with change, but culture and tradition will always stay rooted within us. Whether we like it or not. For sure there needs to be a wider and more balanced outlook on sexuality. A more fairer view. A more concerned view for our sons and not an overbearing view on our daughters. A place where I can pull out my vibrator and my mother won’t cuss the shit out of me.

Apathy is the new intimacy


  1. lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.

The new wave of dating but not being in a relationship, is the backbone of today’s youth. It is the root of emotional and mental breakdowns. Intimacy is an artform which we have crafted to no longer exist, aside from the casual hookups. It is the reason why we have the notion of ‘fuckboys’ ‘fuckgirls’ thrown around constantly to give us leverage against each other. This apathy is resonant within the music culture and hip-hop, R&B scene. We have created such a toxic atmosphere where all we hear rappers and singers cry  about all day are from one of the following themes;

  • Why don’t these hoes love me (because hoe is a more empowering term for women, don’t get me started )
  • Why won’t my girl take me back even though I cheated on her. It just doesn’t make sense
  • I enjoy spending my time with various (bad) women but my shawty has got to be (good)
  • I dated a stripper, but if I do refer to her that is what I will call her out on. I will look pass every thing she ever did for me (yes I’m talking about Kanye)
  • Oh I could probably take your girl, because women love running from one man to the other for some reason

These are just a few from the top of my head but they all follow the same genre. It’s tiring being a single woman when you encounter men after men with the same ‘its not that deep’ attitude. Since when was this the answer to everything. Whatever happened to genuine interest and sense of affection and care. Maybe this is all the rage whilst at University, but I guess there are quite a handful of women (apart from me) who crave more. This sense of not caring to show you are alright, is detrimental. It is lonely and it isn’t fruitful. I don’t want to be waiting or not waiting for your text. I don’t want to be lead on just for fun. I don’t want to have to kiss a dozen frogs for my prince.