that’s what they call love

the way she speaks of God

is the way i speak of her

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Aaliyah

and they never tell you how to deal with heartbreak over friends

they never tell you how deep the pain runs

but it happens. and you live

but to me you will always be my first love

and no one else can displace the energy and passion i put into you

so i wish you well, but i can’t see this through

you can always call me your home – you could have tried a little harder for us

Ever never lasting 

a man’s love is as conditional as the thing he desires. To what he can get out of it.

a woman’s love is unconditional to what she can put into it. To the potential she sees. 

empower me. you do

I have not been let down as many times emotionally from a woman than i have a man. Women are the driving force for me to love and self love. From too many setbacks and unclear paths with a male companion, i decided a long time ago to give my heart and soul to me. To women like me. To women like you. 

Yet the bit that frustrates me aside from the empowerment is the distrust in women. We fear each others power and sexual prowess in relation to a man. Sometimes it is not enough hearing it from her, that you need to hear it from him. The final word. The final say. It is the bitterness and rivalry we are conditioned to play out in various scenarios with other females. Yes, disliking a female on personal matters relating to you does not mean that you have dropped the baton of empowerment. It is still there. But the sizing up and deducing where the other womans loyalty lies is a tricky game. The ‘maybe she said that to play with me. Did she really mean it. He didn’t think so.’ That dialogue is one which we all women need to work on. The catfighting over each others ex and asking ‘Is she better than me?’ 

No honey. That is where we fall down the rabbit hole. 

‘She is beautiful in her entirety, as I am in mine.’ Say it with me. Empower yourself and don’t fall suit to doubting the divine feminine energy which you posess.

Lots of love xo

If he has to be “kept” I don’t want him

What is this notion of keeping a man? The birthright of a woman passed down from generation to the next, teaching us how to ‘satisfy’ and ‘keep’ a man. What if the man does not want to be “kept” and enjoys his bachelor ways? What happens then?
Stemming all the way back to our ancestors, woman have had to hold the brunt for various things. Feminism and equality are notions which have been pushed to the forefront just recently. Yet there are still these internalised beliefs engrained in us. These beliefs which men enjoy entertaining and which women, somehow, have come to accept.
From over saturation of sex within the media and social platforms churning out the same repeated garbage, it is no wonder us women are left with low self-esteem. Being the embodiment of sex along with grace, humility, shame and having an oceon of love to span the world and back, the requirements for female is an all time high. With everything being of face value, presentation of a women is highly scrutinised. “Oh that’s too much make-up, oh her clothes are too fitting,” yet somehow these are the basis on how a man should be kept. I, for one did not realise the value of love was translated through the currency of upkeep and maintenance and not affection.
If a woman enjoys being sexual and takes it in her own hands, that is not the reason why she can not “keep” her man. If a woman enjoys being in a powerful position and earns the bread, that is not the reason why she can not “keep” her man.
Her man does not want to be kept if he has made up his mind. Repeat this after me. It is not on the onus of his partner. It is solely him and him only. Her being a “good girl” or being “tolerant” would not have swayed the mans decision anyway. So stop victim shaming women after everything they’ve been through.